Falling in Love Abroad

Since its February and it is considered the love month (among many things), I wanted to talk about falling in love abroad. Is it possible? Yes. Has it happened to me? No. But I have fallen in deep like with several guys but have not fallen in love. Honestly, I think its pretty beautiful when people fall in love abroad.  It shows that people can find love anywhere, which is beautiful. To me, I always liked hearing how people fall in love. How they met and how they handled a long-distance relationship. Sometimes listening to how they even had to deal with their different cultures is always interesting. I’m not sure why I decided to write about this topic this week. Lately I have been been thinking about if my future partner is in another state. I’m not sure, but I can wait. Plus, it was during my time in Spain when I listened to a singer named Tori Kelly and her song “Dear Nobody”. The song is about waiting on the right person. Looking back on it, it was interesting that I discovered that song while abroad. That maybe why I thought this topic. Love anywhere is always beautiful. As long as all parties smile, that’s all that matters.

Photo by Nandhu Kumar on Pexels.com

Travel Tip: Fall in Love when your time is right no matter where you are.

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Letting Go

Many times, we hear the words let go and everything will work out. Sometimes when we let go, things tend to fall apart, while at other times things go well. I find letting go to be quite refreshing because it allows you to start over and to show your true self.
This week I was able to let go my fear of not being good enough. For so long I used to believe that when I try something new that I am never good enough, but sometimes it takes others to point out that you are doing fine. This week it took for one of my friends to help me realize that I am supposed to be pursued and not chasing. I had been talking to a guy for over a month and we never met because neither one of us would follow up with meeting and it was almost me planning the days and times we met. I was honestly thinking of letting him go, but I thought that I was overreacting. Then my friend told me to let the guy try and we have not talked since the last time I reached out. That’s when I realized I had to let go. Not necessarily let go of finding the one but letting go the need to constantly must plan things when it comes to my love life.

blonde hair blur daylight environment
Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

I’ve realized that when you let go of the need to control certain things that you can become free to fill your time with things that matter. My message this week is let go of the need to have control and just enjoy life, while smiling.

I Messed Up

Through out life we can often hold ourselves up to certain expectations and it hurts us when we do not honor those commitments to ourselves. As many people know through my blog post that I had decided to go a year without dating. The primary reason for this decision was to focus on school. Well I started to date and my one year is not officially over yet, which I am disappointed in myself in. However, through breaking this commitment to myself, I have learned that I am much stronger in getting rid of guys that are obviously not for me (I have fallen for certain guys like this before). But I have been attracting guys who treat me like the queen I am. However, I have realized that there is always a reason that we mess up and it’s for the lesson. The lesson I learned from going back on my year of dating is the importance of showing people how you want to be treated. Since I was a teenager, I have always just assumed that if I treat people good, they would treat me good. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way many times that that not everyone believes in treating others kindly. Therefore, it is important to show others how you deserve to be treated. If they cannot get with the program of how you deserved to be treated then there is no need for them to be in your life.

One of the most crucial lessons I learned was that being myself is the best person to be. I honestly used to be more reserved and just allow people to treat me any certain way. Now, I understand the power of standing up for myself and not being afraid to say what I need to say. Also, I realized that my intuition and energy levels are always right. If my energy feels off with a person, I now have no problem with letting them go. If my intuition says run, then I need to start running, My intuition has never lied to me once, therefore I have my trust in that feeling. So even though I did not completely finish my year, I know that I can achieve great things without a significant other, and that its ok to take time to heal and be focused on yourself.

So go forth, be great and smile. Also, what are some things that you have to do/ or have done to get refocused? Please comment, like and subscribe.

A Letter to the Graduates

Dear  anyone who is graduating from an educational institution,

First, I want to say congratulations on all your accomplishments. No matter where you are graduating from I am truly happy for all your achievements. Also, less not only congratulate only the college graduates but also the, people graduating from trade school. Sometimes we can forget to acknowledge all the different types of graduates not only the high school and college.

During graduation, it seems as though that in that moment everything we worked for is worth it. All the late nights, tears and procrastination were worth it to walk across the stage and to see the smiles on the ones we love faces. At that moment everything seems perfect. However, this letter is to address the days after we walk.

The days after we walk, we are still excited and glowing in joy. Many people expect you to have a plan and to know your next five steps. Honestly sometimes you do and sometimes you don’t. But soon after we start to realize that now it’s time to the “right thing”. Which for most people is getting a job or for some taking a trip through Europe. If you do not have a plan out of graduation, its ok. Take your time and begin where you need to begin. Never forget your worth. That does not mean that when you first graduate from college/ high school/ trade school that you will be earning six figures, very rarely does that happen. And that’s ok. Its ok to start from the bottom and make your way to the top. Sometimes if you change positions to get ahead or a higher pay that’s ok. Also applying to thing’s you think you may not be qualified for is ok as well. Sometimes we can short sell ourselves which can prevent opportunities, but always take advantage of all the opportunities that come your way. Even if they seem scary they may take you to an unexpected place.

Down the line, things may start to take longer than other people, however do not compare yourself. When you compare yourself, you lose your self. Losing yourself is the worst thing you can do because it takes a long time to re find yourself. Even though life is about uncovering who you are, you want to keep moving forward and not regress. Remember your time is your time and you will shine.

There will be times when you look at your bank account and you want to pass out, but know that money will come because your dream job/ business will begin to come when you walk the path. But still experience life via the free things and spending time with the ones you love. Time goes by so fast, make sure you take advantage of it.

 

Once again congratulations and I wish you nothing but the best. Remember to be in the moment and continue down your path.  Also, don’t forget to smile.

 

Sending love and best wishes,

 

Khadijah

To the Love of My Life

If you have been reading my blogs all February, then you know that I have been discussing love especially self-love and while in graduate school. This entry will be a bit different because I want to write a letter to the love of my life. But this letter is not necessarily to the person I hope to spend the rest of my life with (it could be though) but rather to my future self. Some may find this strange, but know that if you do not have unconditional love for yourself, then nobody will fully love you the way you deserve.

dear love of my life Geralt

Dear Love of My life,

I would like to first say that you are truly an amazing person. You have truly stuck by myside when there was less than $5 in my bank account several times. Rather than  give up and tell me to stay in bed you encouraged me to not look at this as though this were my destination rather my first bump on a road to greatness.

I thank you for loving me during the times when I was at my lowest crying in my colleges bathroom because I did not know what to do about all the work piling up. I thank you for being next to me at my lowest moment when I would cry about how I would earn money and obtain experience while studying in an accelerated program. Rather than walk away, you sat next to me and reminded me that I had a great deal to accomplish. You me told that  all of the great things I wanted to do, I needed to take things one step at a time.

You taught me that I was beautiful. For the longest time, I did not like looking at myself in the mirror and always believed that I was not attractive because I had a larger stomach than most. You taught me that no matter my size that I was still amazing and can still dress in away that made me look appealing to myself. Also, you reminded me that if I am find myself beautiful is all that matters. Even when I was sick and felt a wreck, you showed me the strength deep down.

The most important lesson you taught me was no matter if I went to graduate school or choose to get a job straight out of college that I was still amazing. You showed me that my confidence was never lost rather hidden for the right moment. You taught me to always protect my peace and energy, while reminding me that not everyone deserves to be near my radiant spirit.

In sickness and health. Richer or poorer. To death do us part. I promise to love and commit myself to you in a way no one would ever imagine. If I am growing, no one can ever take you from me because with each passing day we are coming together as one.

 

If you read this letter i hope that it helped you. Remember that your first love of your life is yourself. When you show unconditional love for yourself the right person will come to you.

 

Please feel free to like and comment.

Photo from Gearlt on pixaby

 

Love and Happiness in Grad School

 

I hope if your reading this whether you are in a relationship or single that your valentine’s day was wonderful. For me it was a day of relaxing and figuring things out in my life. I did not spend it with a boyfriend because as many people know I am not dating for a year. I honestly did not even do no school work. But during the day it made me think of how many women and even men want relationships and will do just about anything to get/ keep a partner. However, that has never been me.

graduate school love

I will admit that at times I do want to be in relationship at night. But, I have learned thus far in my graduate school journey that I must be responsible for my own love and happiness. I cannot wait for someone to come in and love me or create the happiness I desire. When I love myself it not only places a glow upon me, but it allows for people to see how I want to be treated. Also, self-love shows people that its ok to love yourself no matter what. When you love yourself in your sad and happy moments it allows you to see the growth inside of you. It also teaches you lessons that you may have once considered irrelevant. In regard to happiness, happiness can be as simple as smiling at the fact of being alive. When you embrace the small moments, especially in the craziness, it not only helps to get through the small moments but it helps you to appreciate things even in the down moments.

Personally, in graduate school I have had mental break downs where I did not know what to do. I would cry and scream and honestly, I may do these things again before the semester is out. I would even focus on meaningless task when I knew I had an assignment due. Then I would procrastinate. However, when I begin to express gratitude for the things I am doing or even my mini successes, I begin to feel as though that everything will be ok. So if your reading this, I want you to go out, be happy, love yourself, express gratitude for the little things and smile.

Picture from: pixaby

Loving Yourself Even When Your Wrong

Have your ever made so many mistakes, that you began to question why in world the universe would give you certain task? Well if you have asked yourself that question, then you are just like me. Within the past 24 hours I have made multiple mistakes that I promised myself I would not make and ignored my intuition when it said to leave certain things alone.

loving when wrong The first mistake I made was with school. I completely procrastinated on all my assignments that I had due. Even when I had a schedule that I was going to follow to get all of my assignments done. Did I follow it? Nope. I was on social media and doing everything else under the sun/moon. The whole time my intuition was telling me, get off your phone and other media and finish your homework and work on your personal projects. Then when I finally did sit down to do my assignments, it was rushed and it honestly showed that I put no care into the work.

The second mistake I made was with social media. I was in a group that was solely focused about dating and was talking to people as though I was interested in pursuing something romantically with them. My intuition was telling me to get off social media and was reminding me that i knew full well that the only reason I was doing this is because I am procrastinating what I needed to do. I then began to feel bad because I knew that I was cheating my year of no dating.

love when right      I knew full well I should not have been doing either one of these things. I knew that I should not have been doing any of those things. I should have been choosing to better myself and grow, rather than focusing on temporary fixes. Some may read this and believe that I am being hard on myself, however, when you know what you are capable of, you know you should not be settling for less.  Despite my screw ups, I still love me. I hold myself and apologize and move forward knowing that if I choose to do the right thing in the next moment, then my wrongs are not as bad. So to anyone reading this, remember even when things do not go according to plan and you mess up, Love yourself enough to apologize, hug yourself, continue forward and smile.