This year has truly been one for
the books. In 2018 I have seen this blog truly grow, discovered what I am truly
passionate about, and learned that my own company is sometimes the best company
to have. That’s not to say that 2018 did not have its moments of pain. I lost
some people who were close to me. I had to walk away from people who I thought
would always be there for me as well as people who i believed would go to the
next level with me. Even in the last few
days I have begun to let go of people who do not encourage me to be and do
honestly say that 2018 has taught me a very two very important lessons, which
was that my intuition is a lot stronger than I gave myself credit for. My
second lesson was to always travel through life, not just to new places but
also through everyday moments. My intuition is a muscle that I have been
building up for years after constantly breaking it. This muscle is truly getting
stronger and I am grateful. Each time I traveled whether to a new country or
city, I have learned so much about myself and I learned that the journey is in
the everyday work. Between my intuition and my travel throughout life I can
honestly say I am ready for 2019.
reading this, I want to say thank you for reading my blogs all year. Thank you
for the likes and comments. I hope 2018 was a year of growth for you and i hope
2019 is full of smiles and great memories.
This week an old friend of mine reappeared. To many people that may not be significant, however to me it’s usually a test that I always tend to fail. I always fail this test because I always believe that the people from my past often come back to test me to see if I have grown. Then after a few months I realize that I am in the same predicament that I was in during the time we were talking. I always wonder what I did wrong?
When this person returned, a thought from Maya Angelou came to mind; “When someone shows you who they are, believe them”. This old friend has taught me patience, but also showed we that who someone truly cares they won’t leave you, even if you block them. Someone who truly wants to be there will always find a way back to you no matter what. This old friend has seen me at my worst and at my best. We could literally talk about anything. However, we would always get into an argument and just drift apart for a few months. The most recent drift was for almost two years. I think the only reason why I still let this friend come back is not only due to comfort, but because they challenge me like no other. Plus, who they are always makes me feel comfortable, even when they say things that would make me mad beyond words, but the word they spoke would never be things that would make me question how he felt. When he came back I asked him why he came back, he said he just wanted friends. Honestly, I was ok with that. I thought I would want more, however because I am trying to figure things out in my life, I realized its ok to not have expectations when people come back into your life. Never forget the lessons, but just the person run their course. I know some may say to speed them along, but I don’t know how to do that. I am going to let time take its course, take my time during this test and smile.
Through out life we can often hold ourselves up to certain expectations and it hurts us when we do not honor those commitments to ourselves. As many people know through my blog post that I had decided to go a year without dating. The primary reason for this decision was to focus on school. Well I started to date and my one year is not officially over yet, which I am disappointed in myself in. However, through breaking this commitment to myself, I have learned that I am much stronger in getting rid of guys that are obviously not for me (I have fallen for certain guys like this before). But I have been attracting guys who treat me like the queen I am. However, I have realized that there is always a reason that we mess up and it’s for the lesson. The lesson I learned from going back on my year of dating is the importance of showing people how you want to be treated. Since I was a teenager, I have always just assumed that if I treat people good, they would treat me good. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way many times that that not everyone believes in treating others kindly. Therefore, it is important to show others how you deserve to be treated. If they cannot get with the program of how you deserved to be treated then there is no need for them to be in your life.
One of the most crucial lessons I learned was that being myself is the best person to be. I honestly used to be more reserved and just allow people to treat me any certain way. Now, I understand the power of standing up for myself and not being afraid to say what I need to say. Also, I realized that my intuition and energy levels are always right. If my energy feels off with a person, I now have no problem with letting them go. If my intuition says run, then I need to start running, My intuition has never lied to me once, therefore I have my trust in that feeling. So even though I did not completely finish my year, I know that I can achieve great things without a significant other, and that its ok to take time to heal and be focused on yourself.
So go forth, be great and smile. Also, what are some things that you have to do/ or have done to get refocused? Please comment, like and subscribe.
Have you ever heard of the expression, everything happens for a reason? Over this pass year, I have experienced many tough times. I lost my wallet in Canada. My flash drive broke during finals. My kindle got stolen. These are the top three. I can honestly say that after each of these incidents I was devastated and did not know how I was going to handle each of these problems because I did not know what to do. However, at the end of those moments, I learned so much about myself. The key lesson I learned was when things go wrong, it is time to go to the next level. The next level is always uncomfortable, requires elevation and not something one wants to do when everything seems to fall apart, but it is necessary to be the person you are meant to be.
When I lost my wallet in Canada, I was devastated. It was the winter and I fell into the snow crying about what happened, I did not care that I my jeans got ruined. I lost everything from my home keys, my school ID, my debit card, my gift cards and so much more. Thankfully the bus system allowed for me to get back to where I was staying and the person I was staying with gave me a few dollars to be able to make it during the rest of my stay. I did cry and before I asked for help from the person I was staying with, I had to make the decision of if I would complain or finish my trip. Many people in my predicament would have given up, but I could not. I chose to finish my trip. Thankfully my bank had a branch in Canada and I could transfer some money over to the bank in Canada. From losing my wallet in another country, I learned to push through and never let anything stop a trip. I became a stronger person and decided that nothing, including losing my money and identification, would prevent me from completing a task.
When my kindle was stolen and my flash drive broke, I learned the overall lesson twice. With my kindle, someone came in to my home and took it. But on my kindle I had a lot of things on there that was not contributing to my advancing myself. As for my flash drive, I had always left it in my laptop as I carried it around, but this time the drive hit a wall and the piece where you insert into the computer got twisted. This flash drive had all my information and papers since high school. Including all my work from my entire first semester of graduate school and all the blog entries I had ever written. Thankfully, all of my papers had been submitted at this point except for one which I procrastinated and had not finished. I made many attempts to try and get the drive fixed, however it would be upwards of a $1,000. From this I took it to be a sign that it was time to upgrade my storage because I am going to have more task ahead. Unfortunately, my resume information was on there, all that means is I have the chance to begin something new. After these two incidents, I decided to be the person I was meant to be by making lemons out of lemonade. I replaced my kindle and filled it with books that would help better myself. As for my flash drive, thankfully I had an extra one laying around, but I decided to upgrade and get an external hard drive.
From these experiences, I learned that sometimes bad things can happen, however it’s how you react to them that determines your next move. I choose to cry and be sad, but then I must fix it and learn a valuable lesson. From Canada, I learned the importance of moving forward despite losing something major. From losing my kindle and damaged flash drive I learned that material things can always be replaced, but to always take the lesson with you of either having several back-ups, to not take anything for granted, and smile when things get tough.